3/11/22 3/11/22

Blog Politics Is There a Reason to Ban certain Books?

Years ago, when I did the research for someone working to stop pornography, I learned about grooming. A pedophile chooses a child and seeks to spend time gaining the child’s trust. The pedophile shows the child explicit pictures to help normalize the act in the child’s mind.

Eventually, this leads to sexual assault. Such graphic material if found by someone near a playground or a school or on a computer might well get that person arrested.

Now we’re hearing about parents calling for banning books at schools and libraries. The idea may make a person cringe. I remember when a group tried to get Tom Sawyer and Huckleberry Finn banned. More recently some schools and libraries are banning Bibles and even historical documents that mention, as many do, God.

And yet, there is a place and time to ban certain books. Today when parents call for the banning of certain books, not all may agree on the precise list. However, I can scarcely conceive of the administrators, teachers and librarians, and others who insist certain books should be available--even for elementary-age children.

These books with graphic text and pictures show adults performing sex acts with children. Some are child-on-child assaults. This isn’t a gender issue. It is an age-appropriate, health and well-being of children issue.

Sexually explicit books and material in libraries and/or curricula is probably illegal. Anyone pushing this type of material shouldn’t be in education, they should be in jail. Parents, are you checking everything your children are seeing and learning in school? You might be shocked!

These books groom our children for sexual assault, yet too many adults are pushing for such access. I doubt I would let any child I know be alone with any adult pushing for such access for children

Parents and grandparents and anyone who truly cares for the mental and physical health of a child need to step up and say no. It is time we take a serious look at what books are being offered to our children and teens, what books they are allowed access and what books they may be assigned to read.

Check out what books are available at your school or public library. Check out those running for office, making sure they don’t condone such books. It is truly a time to stand up and ban certain books.

For more specific information and books check: https://omaha.com/news/local/education/nebraska-ed-board-member-says-books-are-hyper-sexualizing-kids-others-say-it-s-a/article_e8bbd00c-8dee-11ec-a2a8-e79907017a0f.html

3/10/22 3/10/22

Bio Book Press Release Three Sisters of Stanhavon Castle

Author Carolyn R Scheidies Latest Novel is a Historical Romance Collection

“Three Sisters of Stanhavon Castle” is the title of Carolyn R. Scheidies’ latest novel series released late fall last year 2021. The Inspirational Regency Romance collection is now in Public and church libraries across the Midwest.

Sheidies who lives in Kearney, Nebraska said, “Most of my book series have been released one at a time. This time we decided to release a volume with all three full-length novels of the new series included.”

That means the “Three Sisters of Stanhavon Castle” volume is a three-book collection all in one. Easy to take along to read, easy to store, and, always, all three novels are available together.

Scheidies said, “I’ve been working on this series on and off for several years, writing and reworking the stories until they felt like a cohesive whole.”

The books are a good balance of plot and character-driven that allows the depth required to create memorable characters that stay with you after the final page is turned.

The Three Sisters of Stanhavon Castle collection includes:
Book 1: The Solicitor and the Marquis’ NieceBook
2: The Earl’s Brother and the Healer Book
3: Sara and the New Marquis

Synopsis: Three sisters have been raised by their loving Uncle Rupert, the Marquis of Stanhavon, since the death of their parents. Though Stanhavon Castle is a crumbling ruin, and the war with Napoleon left the family coffers practically empty, the Marquis raised the girls with an independent spirit and faith. On his death, they are left to fend for themselves.

Jerusalem (Jerri) is the oldest. At 19 she wonders how she’ll care for her younger siblings, especially when their new, handsome, lawyer has few helpful ideas.

Bethlehem (Beth) only a year younger, is a healer, but what is she to do when the new doctor doesn’t believe a young innocent woman should be in the medical profession?

Younger sister Sara struggles with her health, but she is determined to save the castle. What will she do when an heir suddenly shows up, furious at the wrong done his branch of the family generations earlier?

But there is a legend about a hidden treasure. Would discovering it change the heir’s heart about the castle’s future? And what about other strange things happening in the Castle?

The three very different young women deal with their situations in various ways as three unique men enter their lives. They must deal with misunderstandings, danger, and more as they learn that God’s plans are very different from theirs. Will those plans be revealed in time to save their home, their hearts…and their lives?

Scheidies writes for those who enjoy books that lift up and are filled with love and faith and hope.“Three Sisters of Stanhavon Castle” can be ordered through Amazon and most book outlets. Available in print and Kindle versions. http://idealinhope.com/books https://booklocker.com/books/12085.html

3/9/22 3/9/22

Blog A Schedule and the Truth About Control

I like having my days scheduled. Not entirely, of course, but I do like to make lists, so I know what to focus on each day. At this point in my life, I have a pretty good idea how much energy I have and can plan accordingly.

There is so much of my life that I cannot control, I relish the control I do have. Yet, life doesn’t often follow my plan.

I get unexpected phone calls. Some days I don’t feel well. In fact, many things in life take away control. There was the blizzard years ago that was so bad our daughter Cassie and her classmates had to spend the night at the middle school.

Our high school son Chris made it safely to a friend’s house. Keith a counselor at YRTC at the time was forced to stay at work. Some had phone service. Some could only call out or in. I had phone service and made calls to let family know where their loved ones were.

I let our dog into the house, and I spent the night, without power, with our dog and cat. Schedules all over the area were disrupted. We like to think we’re in control, but it only takes a blizzard, health crisis or unexpected loss to show us, we don’t have all that much control over our lives--no matter how much we plan.

It is during those times, I realize all my efforts can turn to ashes in a single moment. It is also during those times, I am glad I am not alone. Those times force me to turn to the only one who knows both my past and my future, and yours. It is during times of crisis, I bow my head and relinquish my way to God’s.

It is also during times of crisis I realize I need to be talking to Jesus not only when my world is rocked, but also daily. It is acknowledging God is in control of life itself. He knows. When I follow Him, my plans may be toast and the way may not be always roses, but Jesus promises to walk beside and never let me go.

That provides the incentive to foster my relationship with Him every day, to know Him, to learn to listen to and trust Him. Then when those difficult times come, it is not hard to turn to my Savior and Friend knowing He’ll see me through if I follow that simple but difficult idiom, “Let go and let God.”That’s also a good way to start each day.

Cast your cares on the Lord and he will sustain you; he will never let the righteous be shaken.--Psalm 55:22

3/5/22 3/5/22

Blog Politics Don't Forget Russia

While we focus on Ukraine and what they are going through, it is easy to forget about the needs of the Russian people. Putin never consulted the citizens on whether or not they wanted him to go to war and try to take over Ukraine. Some citizens are courageous enough to protest.

But Russia has a long history of ignoring its own people or simply cutting them down when certain segments prove rebellious. While we pray for the believers in Ukraine, let us not forget the 87% or so in Russia who claim to be believers.

While the Russian constitution gives lip service to freedom of religion, there is a specific law making Christianity unconstitutional. Those caught sharing their faith may not ever be heard from again, or they are made an example of. Those attending the elegant stained-glass churches, those still open for services, are mainly attended by the elderly who are left alone if that is all the attenders do.

Christians meet in secret, behind closed doors, and in unexpected locations. They move often and meet in small groups. But they do find ways to communicate and meet. Even the decades and decades of repression hasn’t managed to stamp out Christianity nor has repression managed to stop the sharing of the Christian message of hope.

The church may be hiding and underground, but it is real and thriving--despite persecution, despite the risk. When we pray, let us not turn anger at what the Russian government is doing onto its citizens. Instead, let us pray for them as fervently as we pray for our Christian brothers and sisters in Ukraine. The key to change is fervent and serious, believing, prayer. Let’s pray.

3/3/22 3/3/22

Blog Russia, Ukraine and Prayer

Right now everyone is concerned about Russia’s attack on Ukraine. Many of us have read requests for prayers for missionaries--some who feel called to stay, some even with families, while others feel called to leave. Both have proved difficult. Leaving is not that easy.

Staying means-who-knows-what danger. Ukraine has been a country that has a high Christian population, While there are many different religions represented, according to a survey by Razumkov Centre in 2018, 71.7% of Ukraine citizens claim to be believers. This includes Orthodox, Catholics, and Protestants. Many are not only believers.

These persons of faith firmly believe in sharing their faith and have been active in sending missionaries to other countries. They follow Matthew 28: 18-20 NKJV. “And Jesus came and spoke to them, saying, “...Go therefore and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all things that I have commanded you; and lo, I am with you always, even to the end of the age.”

It is no wonder the evil one wants to shut them down. But as Christians, we have power in Jesus. Let us support Ukrainian Christians and other citizens by getting serious with prayer.

Let’s not simply throw a quick word of safety. Let us take time to pray in Jesus’ name for the needs of those who are being attacked. Pray for citizens. Pray for Christians and missionaries. Pray for wisdom and weapons for those fighting.

As you pray think and listen to and allow the Holy Spirit to show you how best to pray. Support our brothers and sisters in Ukraine with prayer.

2/28/22 2/28/22

Blog Bio There are a few bright spots during tax season

My birthday is in January. That used to make January a special month for me. My mom always made birthdays special, so it is no wonder I anticipated the first month of the year. Then I grew up.

Oh, I still enjoy celebrating my birthday, but much has changed. As an author, January is the time I need to do a book inventory and fill out the state form itemizing how many books I withdrew from my inventory for gifts, promotions, or discards. I need to figure out how much sales tax I owe from books I sold personally--as opposed to those sold through brick-and-mortar and online bookstores.

As soon as the new year begins, I gather my information and start putting everything together because documentation is due mid-month. Much of the information will also be used to complete our regular federal and state taxes.

Though I can gather much information online, I do need to wait for tax documents on my book royalties and revenues. Because I don’t trust my math, I usually recheck my figures several times. It is always a relief when I finish and send in the sales tax documentation.

After a deep breath, I start going through the saved receipts I will need for completing federal and state taxes. Each month as we donate to charities, I print out a receipt. At the end of the year, I gather those monthly statements to calculate how much we gave to the different charities.

Usually, these monthly receipts are replaced by a single receipt, documenting what we spent the whole year. At that point, I shred the monthly receipts. (Keith isn’t happy with how many times he has to empty the shredder during January.)

Over the years, I created a tax template that I fill in each year. As I receive information, I add the information to the template. I also start a file for documents I need to keep for tax purposes. Other papers get shredded. I’ve looked toward the end of January because I understood all business and government entities had to send out their tax documentation by the end of the month.

Only February came and we still had not received some needed documentation. When I mentioned to our financial advisor we hadn’t received some of our investment documents, I learned things have changed. Now, these entities have until mid-February to send out that documentation. Sigh!

As frustrating as doing taxes can be, I look back and realize I finally have all my information. Another week or so, I hope, I’ll be able to hand this off to my daughter who takes my information and actually does the taxes. Then I can breathe again.

But, you know, I can handle tax frustrations in January when I think not only about my birthday but the birthdays of loved ones I care about, brother-in-law, sister-in-law, niece, Most of all I look forward to January when we celebrate the birthdays of two very special persons--our granddaughters whose birthdays are thirteen years and one day apart. Makes tax frustrations almost worthwhile.

Meanwhile, I will continue to carefully keep receipts until the tax season starts all over again--next January.

2/15/22 2/15/22

Blog Bio Adulthood definitely not what I thought it would be

As a child, I believed adulthood meant security and doing what I wanted to do. It was better than having to be told what to do all the time. That viewpoint was skewed since my parents treated my siblings and me with respect, never laughing and making fun at our expense. They shared their faith through reading God’s Word, prayer and their daily lives.

We also had consequences for things we did that we shouldn’t have said or done. I saw consequences, and learning from mistakes, as part of childhood. It was learning to be responsible as well as learning to treat others with kindness and respect. Love, respect and kindness were part of our faith.

Jesus created and loved me just as I was, but making wrong choices, hurting myself or others in some way, brought consequences. I learned about someone who loved me even more than my dad. Jesus loved me enough to take the consequences for my bad choices.

I wanted to accept Him into my life. That too, I figured, was growing--learning how to live and love like Jesus. I knew I needed to learn a whole lot to make that happen, considering I was a scrapper who gave as much as I got on and off the playground.

One day the learning stage would be over. I’d be an adult and no one would tell me what to do. Then I got so sick I ended up in a wheelchair I was unable to wheel myself. My future seemed a black hole of pain. Only my folks kept telling me God loved me and had a plan and purpose for my life.

I hung onto those words and kept fighting during my teen years. I fought to be as independent as possible. Eventually, that led to massive surgery once I graduated from college, braces, crutches and a year of relearning how to walk. It meant continued surgeries to keep walking as I married and we raised our family. My life was anything but simple or static.

Growing up wasn’t something one simply attained. It was using experiences to deal with real life. I looked back and was thankful. God had given me so much, especially in good loving friends and family. Adulthood wasn’t security. At any stage of life, there are no guarantees.

I realized problems faced mattered less, than how I dealt with them. Attitude matters. Choices matter. I realized my parents and others in my life modeled something very important--lifting up instead of tearing down, reaching out instead of wallowing in anger, selfishness or pride. It was taking my faith and, as did my parents, living it out in my daily life.

My idea of adulthood was far from realistic. Yet how many dream of some ideal life rather than living each day to its fullest? At my stage in life, I look back, realizing what I’ve gone through isn’t some tragedy.

All I’ve experienced has helped me become the person I am today. Adulthood doesn’t stand alone. We are the sum of our past. Our choices make the difference in how we see not only the past, but today, tomorrow and beyond.

I look back and am grateful and look forward with anticipation knowing my faith will sustain me.

Life is waiting. What choices will you make today?

2/4/22 2/4/22

Poetry What is Wind

Love is a soft, quiet wind
Sometimes gentle
Sometimes Exciting...
Deep
Other centered
Life

Evil is a wind storm
Sometimes subtle
Sometimes obvious
Tempestuous
Alluring
Tempting
Deceptive...
Destructive
Death

Jesus is love
Sometimes gentle
Always strong
Lifting
Protecting
Destroying death
In resurrected
Renewing life—In Him.

2/1/22 2/1/22

Blog Charities—how to choose wisely

I’ve written before about some of my problems with charities. Overall, I do not have problems with the fact that they exist. Most were started for a very good reason and to deal with a problem, a disease or research. Most were started with a lump sum but can only continue their efforts with regular large and small donations to cover expenses.

That’s where promotion comes in. As the charity grows, the need for funds increases. These charities then hire promoters to draw in more patrons to donate. These promoters use social media, news sources, ads, the post office, and live events to reach those who might have a reason to donate. Of course, they seek the deepest pockets possible.

One of my problems has always been that while we donate to several charities, those charities turn around and send us magazines we don’t want or read, and a continuous stream of email and colorful letters and brochures.

I hesitate to donate to a charity that isn’t on our regular list. Why? Because we don’t only receive a simple thank you, but also get on a list that assures we will be inundated through regular and email. Oh yes, and we may also receive address labels, note pads, or other unordered or desired “gifts.”

Recently we received mittens, socks and more from charities to which we’ve never donated. I am sure we were on a list somewhere. This year, we have received so many notepads I am making a stack of them. I hate to throw them away, so I am trying to figure out ways to use them. Maybe I’ll pass some onto my young grandkids to scribble on.

We also have enough address labels to last for the rest of our lives. Our mailbox is filled with emotional appeals for charities--some of which I have never heard of before. Others are perfectly legitimate charities. Yet coffers must be almost empty to spend the money to send fancy literature to individuals and families who have never given to them before.

Many charities, like regular businesses, buy and sell lists of possible donors/customers. Since Keith’s retirement, our finances are not as tight as they were while he worked, and we lived paycheck to paycheck. Add to that some inheritance and we have upped our giving significantly. Still, we do not give indiscriminately.

We gave back to places that helped with things like Keith’s cancer medications. Most of our giving goes to charities who’ve we’ve given to for many years--our church, certain missionaries, organizations who reach out with practical needs to those without, etc.

Those charities we do not support waste their promotion money by calling--we do not give online, emailing--emails are sent to the junk folder, regular mail that gets opened, then trashed.

I do hope charities doing good work and spending wisely receive the donations required to continue. But, I also wish these charities had a more narrow, targeted focus, not a shotgun approach that, more often than not, misses the mark and wastes some of those dollars they need so much.

Before donating check out the charity. Is it legitimate? Do most of their income go to promotion, salaries, and offices or to the reason they exist? Give only as it works for your budget and don’t get pulled in by emotional appeals. (One reason we stopped giving via phone call was that urge to give in to an emotional appeal before checking things out.)

The constant appeals do get old, so scrap those that hold no interest, Sort out the few that do, and brighten someone’s life by reaching out with a donation. After all, generosity is a good thing. Not only does thoughtful giving make us feel good, but also helps others.

1/17/22 1/17/22

Blog Why we must nourish hope

A new year always brings a sense of newness and hope. We let the old year go, sometimes with regret, lately more with relief. Surely the new year will be better, safer, and more back to normal. Of course, that’s what we were told about 2021. And yet, hope still rises for a future better than the past couple of years.

We have hope because that capacity is built not in our culture or race, but within the very fabric of our DNA. A farmer may plant a crop looking for a harvest due to years of farming and experience. But however many years of experience a farmer may have, farming carries risk.

It is hope that makes a difference, providing the farmer the edge that there will be a harvest and it will be good. Hope is a large component of almost every endeavor from investments and inventions to personal relationships.

Marriage begins with love, faith that the relationship will last, and hope that it will. When we do something to hurt someone, when we apologize we do so with the hope a relationship can be restored. What is interesting about hope is that it is often dashed in light of reality, and yet, we move forward with an element of hope.

Orbison Sweet Marsden said, “There is no medicine like hope. No incentive so great, and no tonic so powerful as expectation of something better tomorrow.

Hope may not seem all that important until it is gone, leaving only darkness and the belief that life is no longer worth living. Losing hope means losing everything. Losing hope leads to depression, anger and even quitting to the point of taking one’s life.

This is why we need to nourish hope in ourselves and others, especially our children. It is filling our minds with life-affirming words, pictures, and other media. It is lifting up through encouragement--a letter, a phone call, an email, or even a text can make a difference in someone else’s life.

Only a short time into the new year and our resolutions are most likely broken. We wonder why we bothered to make them. But broken resolutions can become the foundation for hope and a better tomorrow--regardless of our circumstances.

Life will never be all roses and sunshine. Bad days, weeks happen. There are illnesses, cancer, and death. Tragedies happen. Hope is the difference between wallowing in the hurt and pain and allowing time to grieve, but still moving forward with faith and hope.

John Greenleaf Whittier wrote, “Behind the cloud the starlight lurks,
Through showers the sunbeams fall,
For God, who loveth all His works,
Has left His hope for all.

In this new year, let us choose to always keep hope alive.

Faith will help us get there.

1/3/22 1/3/22

Blog Before speaking, remember “soft” words

We used to live in a culture that tolerated, sometimes even encouraged diverse points of view. This respect for one another and for other points of view has eroded into “If you don’t think speak, believe as I do, you are dangerous and must be shut down and stopped.”

This is especially prevalent with those seeking to tear down basic American values and structure. A girl at a family pizza place is asked her opinion and, because it was not a liberal point of view, the word went out and social media blew up in hate that shut down a restaurant run by a family that needed the income to support their family. Thankfully word of the situation got out and decent Americans began going to the restaurant and contributing enough to keep the place in business.

Those who did not like President Trump forced many who worked in his administration to be hounded, hassled, and assaulted in restaurants and other establishments. In many places, police are assaulted and even murdered because hatred has replaced decency, tolerance, and respect.

More and more seek violent solutions rather than peaceful ones. Emotion has replaced thought or consideration of consequences. There are better ways of dealing with disagreements than the BLM chant calling cops “pigs” and calling for them to be “fried like bacon.”

Hatred leads not to resolution but to violence and a corresponding response of violence. It is a cycle that grows more violent and evil. There is another way.

Florence Nightingale changed the nursing profession and garnered respect, but not with violence or disrespect. She was sent with nurses into a war Britain was fighting. The doctors wanted nothing to do with them, but Florence and her nurses quietly tended wounded soldiers and made such a difference, they gained first respect and then the cooperation of the doctors.

Martin Luther King could easily have advocated for violence. Horrible things were done to his people. They were mistreated in shameful ways. Yet King kept working toward reconciliation, worked toward the rights of all races to be treated fairly and with respect. He made a difference, cooling violence and showing Americans a better way.

The path of peace starts by using every peaceful and lawful way possible. It means changing hearts and minds, often one-on-one, with truth, information, and genuine concern—including changing laws as necessary.

Scripture advocates for personal behavior and responsibility. Romans 12:21, “Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.” You could add hate to this. Yet love and good are ultimately stronger than hate and evil, which does nothing but tear down and destroy. The more hate and evil is catered to, the worse the situation becomes.

Change doesn’t start with someone else. It starts with you and me. It starts with letting go of anger, revenge, and hate. It starts as Proverbs 15:1 states, “A soft answer turns away wrath, but grievous words stir up anger.” How does this play out?

We're furious. We respond and the incident escalates. But what if when we're furious, we think before we speak or act? If what we say does not accuse or add fuel to the fire, most likely, the situation de-escalates, and we can deal rationally with the situation.

Though we live in a vengeful, payback, culture, we don't have to feed into that philosophy. It is not God's way. Want peace? Stand up for truth, yes. But, start by thinking before speaking, writing, texting and speak “soft” words to defuse.

Can you think of a better resolution for the new year than to seek peace and pursue it in our lives, families, and to those around us? May God’s love lead to His peace in our hearts, our behavior, and our world.

12/20/21 12/20/21

Blog Bio Christmas, Jesus and Santa

When I was a preschooler, my pastor father served a church in Clitherall, Minnesota. Originally, we lived in a house too small for our growing family. The church bought the bank building on main street to use as the church until they bought a church building, moving it in onto some property they owned.

The bank building became our new home. It was a beautiful red brick building with double entry doors and a fancy ceiling. Several rooms were created on one side for three bedrooms--right next to the still functioning vault, my folks were careful to keep locked. There was a room at the far end that was turned into our kitchen. It also held a large fireplace.

Since this was in the 1950s, the building had no indoor bathroom. We had an outhouse out back. But come Christmas, the fascinating aspect of our house was that fireplace. I don’t think I ever saw it lit. However, we knew the story of Santa Claus and the need for a fireplace so Santa could leave gifts.

With our Swedish heritage, Christmas was Christmas Eve for us. Early on, our folks started traditions that included Dad reading the Christmas story before we each gave thanks for our blessings. Only then did Dad hand out our gifts--one at a time so we could appreciate each one and the giver.

Back then, we did not have much, and every gift really was appreciated--mostly homemade. Our folks were careful to make sure we understood the true meaning of Christmas was Jesus coming to earth to live, and die a martyr’s death--sacrificing His life for all the wrongs we did. Then He rose again conquering death itself to offer life in Him both now and forever as we bowed before Him.

But that was Christmas Eve. My sister and I (our brother Paul was born when we lived in Minnesota and was way too young) went to bed excitedly anticipating our gifts from “Santa” the next morning. Early the next morning we rushed to the kitchen area to see what was by the fireplace. Yes. There were gifts. I remember a huge coloring book and some smaller items. It was exciting to think that Santa remembered us.

Karin was older by 3 ½ years and didn’t want me to have illusions about what Christmas was all about. “Mom and Dad actually gave us these gifts,” she told me. What! Even at my young age, I knew it was difficult for our folks to buy us gifts. And these were extra gifts--not from Santa?

Karin explained that Santa was fun, but not real. That Jesus was real and the true reason for Christmas. Some families are all in about Santa and Jesus plays only a minor role. Other families ban Santa altogether.

My folks took a different approach. They helped us realize Santa is a fun myth and allowed us to embrace that aspect of the holidays. But, they also made sure we understood the center of our celebration remained on the truth that a very real Savior did come to save and set us free for one reason--because He loved us.

What helped me put our traditions in perspective was a graphic that circulated some years ago. It was a picture of the manger, with Santa on his knees before the baby Jesus.

As the angels told the shepherds, “Behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy which will be to all people. For there is born to you this day in the city of David a Savior, who is Christ the Lord…” Luke 2:10b-11 NKJV

Let us worship at the manger this Christmas.
Merry Christmas!

12/7/21 12/7/21

Blog How to balance family, technology

We live in a culture where even intact families may not spend much time together as a family. There are long work hours, especially in a struggling economy. There is school for the kids, jobs, and maybe even taking care of elderly family members.

But aside from those more normal situations, we are inundated with technology. For many, their cell phones connect the owners to work and, even at home, they are involved with their job. We give our children cell phones at a young age and they learn to text and communicate with friends at all hours of the day and, too often, at night as well.

Others become addicted to video games and spend as much time as possible gaming alone or with friends. In fact, every member of the family may have reason to be on their cell phones, tablets, or computers. Virtual experiences often take the place of real face-to-face connections.

Online friendships are shallow and transient and can turn quickly into bullying if one says the wrong thing or in the wrong way. Even when the family gathers for a meal, they aren’t really sharing their day when each is ready to check their cell phones when they whirr or beep. “I’ve got to get this.”

Technology, if not restricted with boundaries, separates and divides friends and families. It is hard to take interest in your child sitting at the table trying to share about his or her day, when mom or dad won’t stop looking at their phone, answering texts or emails, or playing a game.

How discouraging to know, as a child, you are not more important to your parents than their technology. Why not immerse yourself in your phone? It is certainly better than being ignored. Many children spend so much time on their phones, playing games, or watching videos, they never learn how to focus and their bodies do not get enough exercise to keep them healthy.

Families lose out when they build faux relationships through technology rather than appreciating, interacting, and caring for their real family who needs them. Children need parents who care by being present, by listening and responding, and who aren’t always sneaking looks at their phones.

Families and individuals to be healthy need time away from technology. Time with others to talk, interact, laugh, and share. It may take setting boundaries for parents as well as children.

Boundaries may include the following though your guidelines will depend on your family: Eating at least one meal a day together as a family--actually asking questions and listening.
No tablets or cell phones are at the table.
When someone wants to speak to you, give them your full attention--no sneak cell peaks.
No technology after lights out--even if that means collecting tablets and phones before bedtime.
Schedule time as a family to play card or board games. There are any number of games that can involve the whole family.

These are only a few ideas for having healthier relationships between technology, yourself, and your family.

Yes, I love my laptop and tablet. We still have a home phone, but I wouldn’t leave home without my cell. I see it not only as a way to keep in touch, not only to be able to use the GPS function as I can get lost in a paper bag, but also as a safety in case something happens, and we need emergency services.

But setting boundaries makes our lives richer and our families stronger. Today is a good day to start caring enough to set some restrictions.

11/22/21 11/22/21

Blog The importance of giving thanks

The Bible has any number of verses that deal with gratitude and giving thanks. Psalm 106:1 (KJV) states, “Praise ye the Lord, O give thanks unto the lord; for He is good: for his mercy endures for ever.

Giving thanks to a higher power than ourselves lifts our minds and hearts as well as focuses our attitudes away from complaining and blaming to lifting up instead of tearing down. Too often, however, it is easier not to practice gratitude, not to give thanks, not to praise anything or one.

Excuses grow as our grumpy attitude grows. Oh give thanks to the Lord! But not this evening. I had a rotten day at the office and have this beastly headache.

Oh give thanks to the Lord! Not now! Not when I’ve put up with the kids squabbling all day. Jimmy messed his diapers on the way to the store. What a mess! Besides, I may be coming down with the flu.

Oh give thanks to the Lord! Good grief! How can I give thanks when my favorite aunt just died? We were so close, and I wasn’t ready for this.

For all our many and varied excuses, God’s Word doesn’t change to suit our vacillating moods or circumstances. Philippians 4:4 (KJV) reads, "Rejoice in the Lord always: and again I say, Rejoice."

1 Thessalonians 5:18 (KJV) reads, "In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you."

Most books on inspiration mirror that a positive attitude and gratitude are good for our relationships and our health. Most of our problems, big or small, don’t seem quite so insurmountable when we refuse to tumble into a pattern of complaining.

By complaining and refusing to be thankful, we imply God either isn’t strong enough or doesn't care enough to help us in our times of need. It implies that short-term problems are bigger and more encompassing than they really are.

By our negative words and actions, we deny ourselves the comfort not only of God’s presence to lift us up and give us a new perspective on our circumstances, but also make those around us not want to be around us. Our attitude affects everyone, not just you and me.

Do I truly wish to always be unhappy, dragging down my family, friends, and everyone around me? Or do I wish to look up and let laughter and love flow through me, changing my perspective and my attitude?

Especially in downtimes, I need to remember to give thanks and to look up. Attitude matters. Why not choose to develop one of gratitude? What better to time to start than during a celebration of Thanksgiving when giving thanks is supposed to be the core reason for the holiday. This year let’s make sure it is.

So, what are you thankful for?

11/10/21 11/10/21

Poetry Am I Walking with Jesus?

Walking with Jesus should
Make a difference.
Do I?
Does it?

He keeps his promises.
Do I?
He is willing to forgive, forget.
Am I?
Do I?

He seeks truth,
is truth.
Do I prefer my assumptions to His truth?
He is loving and kind.
Am I?

Or do I rationalize negative attitudes,
And respond accordingly?
He hates evil, sin and wrong,
knowing they destroy.
Do I love and trust Him enough to fight against them, too—
In my life, family, community, nation?

Am I willing to follow His way, not mine?
Allow Him control, to live within?
Realizing walking with Jesus means
Becoming all He created me to be

For in letting go,
I find forgiveness and hope,
And a Savior friend who never lets me go.

© 2021 Carolyn R Scheidies
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11/8/21 11/8/21

Blog Bio Dogs, fosters, adoption and love

Recently my seventeen-year-old granddaughter told me she’d been cleaning up the backyard because they planned to foster a Husky dog. She was so excited to bring home a shelter Husky named Bear. I could tell she was already loving that dog.

I can’t blame her. Several years ago, our daughter Cassie had a friend who fostered dogs. She told Cassie about a little dog foster that had been rescued from a puppy mill. The young dog had spent his life in a cage.

Cassie ended up adopting Melvin who proved to be a sweet dog without a mean bone in his body. His main anxiety was not wanting Cassie out of his sight. She had Melvin for many years, giving him special attention as he aged.

She married and Melvin adopted Kurt as part of the family and then included two children. When he died, the family grieved.

My brother pretty much always had dogs—usually larger dogs. He brought a dog into his marriage with Lorene and throughout their marriage, they adopted several dogs from the shelter. Their dogs were their kids. Finally, they decided not to get another dog.

At least, they thought they both decided that only to discover both were, on their own, checking out dogs at the shelter. That did it, they adopted another dog who needed them.

This dog was big, gentle, and huggable. He also thought he was a lapdog. When they settled in their recliners, Franee would jump into a lap and snuggle down. Paul walked the dog up to our house, but often they walked Franee at Yanney Park. They loved that dog.

Then Paul had a massive heart attack and was gone. The love she and Paul shared with a needy animal came back to sustain Lorene as she dealt with Paul’s loss. Because they were willing to adopt, she received a gift of Franee’s love that has helped her through her grief.

We usually had dogs and often cats when we grew up. Since dad was a minister, we moved every few years. Some places were more conducive to pets than others. Wyoming was a great place for pets, but we didn’t buy them. They came to us. A dog or cat who needed a home found our place. If they looked hungry, mom fed them.

Some moved on. Others stayed and became part of the family, though the restriction was that their main home was outside. (Dad built a dog house.)

One of my best memories is the day we moved to Lance Creek Wyoming. Mrs. Wilson who ran the motel for truckers just down the road had the key to the parsonage. We walked over with her. Mrs. Wilson pointed out the huge dog on the stoop.

She started explaining most were afraid of the animal, but he had refused to leave with the last pastor. Members threw food over the fence for the dog. She wasn’t sure what to do, but Paul, a toddler, before anyone could stop him, opened the gate, marched up to the dog, and hugged him.

I followed, leaving the adults stunned. Skipper had adopted us. He proved to be a wonderful dog. When he died, he left us with many good memories. I could tell many more stories of dogs who met a need for those who adopted them or whom they adopted.

Looking for a dog? Instead of paying through the nose for some fancy breed, consider a shelter pet. These dogs are so ready to give love and are often brave, smart, ready to love the individual or family who reaches out,

11/3/21 11/3/21

Poetry Let it Slide

Easy to let things slide,
Grab the time for me
Today I’ll skip my time with God,
No big deal, right?
One day I won’t take time to read His Word
Or pray

Today I’ll hurry to work
Rush off without hugs goodbye
Today I’ll focus on ME
Who are “They” to tell me what to do?

Yet, I grind my teeth when the car ahead stalls
Tense when a colleague tells the same worn-out joke—
For the thousandth time
Work without rest or lunch

Home again with excuse, “Sorry kids, spouse, too tired for
A hug, or a moment of time, or even a smile,
Go play, go to the kitchen, go to your room…go away!

Lord why do I feel so defeated?
Now my spouse is angry and upset,
My kids too quiet and hurt

Surely I have time for only me, true and yet
There are others to consider
I’ve had no peace today
Maybe tomorrow, Lord,
I’ll start my day with You.

(C) 2021 Carolyn R Scheidies
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10/25/21 10/25/21

Blog Bio Home, mice, snakes and perspective

I loved cowboys and horses. So, when my minister got a church in Wyoming when I was in elementary, I was thrilled. I didn’t much care about the house. Mom did. Especially when she began hearing persistent scratching behind their closet wall. My mom freaked when a rodent emerged. Turned out to be one huge rat.

Dad quickly dispatched the unwanted visitor and made certain that would not happen again. Except for that exception, mice stayed away from our house well-guarded by several cats that considered our place home.

When Keith and I married we first lived in an apartment house. One day I found evidence of an unwanted visitor in the kitchen. We bought traps and I put food in plastic containers. I was in the kitchen when our visitor dashed across the floor. I screamed for Keith who rushed in and stomped on the mouse--in his socks. Grossed me out. Mice became a problem.

I was relieved when we moved to another, larger apartment on the other end of the mouse-infested one. Then we moved to an older house that had any number of insects and rodents, Traps became a way of life. Mice made me cringe.

Thanks to a government program, my brother Paul was able to build a house geared toward my limitations. Nice, clean and accessible. Yet, in the fall, mice seemed to find a way into the house, probably from the attached garage. Again, traps were a way of life. At least only one or two got in each year.

After our kids were in elementary, Chris got a dog and Cassie got a cat named Cutie. With Cutie in the house, mice had no chance and they disappeared from our lives. Unfortunately, our mice problem turned into a snake problem.

In fact, for many years I wrote at least one article each year about my adventures with snakes that found a way into the house. Eventually, the snakes also disappeared--at least inside the house. Then we had some siding work done.

About that time, we discovered a mouse in the house. This time we got traps that held poison. The traps took care of that mouse. So much for the mouse problem.

Recently, my sister called early in the morning as I walked into the kitchen from the bedroom. In the semi-darkness, I noticed movement on the ground. At first I thought it was a cricket, Then I scared my sister when I started screaming for Keith.

That movement was a mouse crawling along almost flat against the floor. Gross. Gross. Keith rushed in, took a look and slammed his cane down. I had to explain to my sister as Keith got rid of that dying mouse.

I was thankful, we’d never picked up the poison traps we’d put down last year. Thankfully, that seems to be the only mouse that managed to get inside. Over the years we have had either mice or snakes.

As much as I dislike both these creatures, when I see what is going on in our world I realize how small my problem with mice or snakes really is. Those bigger problems put things in perspective. I guess I can deal with snakes and mice—especially if Keith is near.

10/21/21 10/21/21

Poetry Devotion Let Go

Let go and let God.
Cliché
Easier said than done
Letting go the need to control
Letting go pride and unforgiveness
Letting go hurts
Letting go…

Beginning to understand, finally.
Life happens
Yet only God can change my heart
Bring wholeness as I let go my burdens
They hold me back,
Make me miserable,

As I offer them up
He takes my hurting, angry heart
And helps me let them go, move forward,
Lighter, whole, without anchors holding me back

He asks what is both simple and difficult
To come, ask, hand Him those things
We’re holding on so tightly,
For letting go and letting God
Sets us free to be all God designed us to be.

Let go…it can be done.
It is a choice.

“Come to Me, all who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.
——Matthew 11:28 NASB

10/18/21 10/18/21

Poetry His Special Gift

***Photo by*** ***Jess Bailey*** on ***Unsplash***

It’s all a gift, all that I have
However I strive to earn or get
If I am honest,
So much is not me at all
Some call it Good Fortune, Luck, Serendipity
Not willing to face the truth
Of a God interactive in time and space…and in our lives
Who loved enough to come and live and die,
Loved enough to sacrifice His life
For yours and mine and why?
That we might see our need and come to Him
Acknowledging what we hate to admit…our sin
We’ve goofed up more than lifted up
Hurt more than helped
We’d rather pretend self-confidence
Boasting of self-esteem on ephemeral things
Rather than basic truth—God exists
He loves us
He died for rebellion, mistakes and sin,
He conquered death, that you and I might live
Asks in exchange for comfort, peace and hope,
My trust, my will—so hard to give up,
But as I choose to do just that,
My Savior Jesus Christ
Turns luck into blessings,
Pain into promise,
And fortune into a sure future with Him
For Jesus offers forgiveness and salvation
Fills our hearts with compassion and caring,
And the realization that it isn’t my striving,
But His love that rescues me—freely given
All a gift
Because of His love.
I bow.
(C) 2021 Carolyn R Scheidies
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I plan my life out a day at a time, so my posting schedule can be erratic.

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