11/17/22 11/17/22

Don’t spend the holidays alone—reach out

Temperatures are cooling outside. Getting downright cold in the mornings. Fall has sneaked up on us. Winter is not far behind. With the change in seasons to fall and, soon, winter, we turn our thoughts to family gatherings.

The Scheidies family likes getting together, though that was much simpler when there were fewer of us. Now we have siblings—my husband Keith and his brothers and sister, kids, grandkids, and even great-grandkids. It makes for quite a household when we gather together at the family farm near Minden. Of course, on the farm, when it isn’t too cold, kids can play outside with uncles giving rides on the four-wheeler or even on a burro. We have found we have more room at the Mitzi Pavilion at Yanney Park. We do both—gather at the farm Saturday night. and gather someplace in Kearney, often the Pavilion, for Sunday morning brunch.

My family is much smaller, and we are more far-flung so don’t get together as often. Still, my sister-in-law lives a few blocks south of us in Kearney, and my sister, her kids, and grandkids live in Kansas. Other relatives live in Minnesota, California, and other places.

Even so, sometimes Keith and I find ourselves alone for some holidays as our kids have other relatives and plans. We often include my brother Paul’s widow. In fact, we sometimes invite friends over to play board games and offer snacks for supper.

I know Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Year’s Eve are difficult times to be alone. This may happen when someone has no family left or family too far away. Sometimes, in the case of our daughter, every other year it is her husband’s family year to have them for Thanksgiving or Christmas. Holidays can get lonely, and it is easy to slide into feeling bad and depressed.

But we don’t have to turn joyful holidays into times of sadness. One couple I know planned holidays around those who would otherwise spend holidays alone. They’d invite these individuals home and hold a regular feast.

We all have friends, acquaintances, and even family who might be alone. We can change that. We don’t have to be depressed and lonely. We can reach out to others who, for whatever reason, are spending a holiday alone. Might be a neighbor, someone from church, a family member or friend. Make an effort to reach out. Invite them to your house or make plans to meet at a restaurant. Is someone not in good health? Take them a meal and stay to visit for a while.

By looking beyond ourselves we find fulfillment and the very joy of the holiday as we reach out, deepen, or make new friendships. Thinking of others helps us take the focus off ourselves and helps us realize how blessed we truly are.

Don’t spend the holidays alone—reach out.

Kearney Hub column published 11/16/22

11/22/21 11/22/21

Blog The importance of giving thanks

The Bible has any number of verses that deal with gratitude and giving thanks. Psalm 106:1 (KJV) states, “Praise ye the Lord, O give thanks unto the lord; for He is good: for his mercy endures for ever.

Giving thanks to a higher power than ourselves lifts our minds and hearts as well as focuses our attitudes away from complaining and blaming to lifting up instead of tearing down. Too often, however, it is easier not to practice gratitude, not to give thanks, not to praise anything or one.

Excuses grow as our grumpy attitude grows. Oh give thanks to the Lord! But not this evening. I had a rotten day at the office and have this beastly headache.

Oh give thanks to the Lord! Not now! Not when I’ve put up with the kids squabbling all day. Jimmy messed his diapers on the way to the store. What a mess! Besides, I may be coming down with the flu.

Oh give thanks to the Lord! Good grief! How can I give thanks when my favorite aunt just died? We were so close, and I wasn’t ready for this.

For all our many and varied excuses, God’s Word doesn’t change to suit our vacillating moods or circumstances. Philippians 4:4 (KJV) reads, "Rejoice in the Lord always: and again I say, Rejoice."

1 Thessalonians 5:18 (KJV) reads, "In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you."

Most books on inspiration mirror that a positive attitude and gratitude are good for our relationships and our health. Most of our problems, big or small, don’t seem quite so insurmountable when we refuse to tumble into a pattern of complaining.

By complaining and refusing to be thankful, we imply God either isn’t strong enough or doesn't care enough to help us in our times of need. It implies that short-term problems are bigger and more encompassing than they really are.

By our negative words and actions, we deny ourselves the comfort not only of God’s presence to lift us up and give us a new perspective on our circumstances, but also make those around us not want to be around us. Our attitude affects everyone, not just you and me.

Do I truly wish to always be unhappy, dragging down my family, friends, and everyone around me? Or do I wish to look up and let laughter and love flow through me, changing my perspective and my attitude?

Especially in downtimes, I need to remember to give thanks and to look up. Attitude matters. Why not choose to develop one of gratitude? What better to time to start than during a celebration of Thanksgiving when giving thanks is supposed to be the core reason for the holiday. This year let’s make sure it is.

So, what are you thankful for?

11/30/20 11/30/20

Blog Count blessings during this holiday season

We could hardly see out the front window. Snow obliterated everything. We were snug in our house, but our daughter, scarcely more than a toddler, was very ill. Her temperature had zoomed to scary levels,

We needed to get her to the doctor, but our car would never make it in the blizzard. We had to do something. We called my brother who lived a few blocks south of us. His car might get through.

Paul didn’t hesitate. He said he’d come. I remember Keith holding Cassie on his lap, both of them dressed for the weather. As soon as Paul pulled up, Keith carried her out to the SUV. Paul got them through to the doctor. A good thing. Cassie had pneumonia and needed medicine. She was sick for quite a while, but thanks to Paul, Cassie got the diagnosis and medication she needed.

When Chris and Cassie were in elementary school both of them came home with the flu. It was nasty and they weren’t making it to the bathroom to throw up. I knew I couldn’t be going room to room so had them snuggle down in our bed. By then the hallway didn’t look or smell so pretty good. I could give the kids water and have them take large doses of vitamin C, but I knew, with my disabilities, I would not be able to clean up the hallway or bathroom.

I called Paul’s wife Lorene. Like Paul, she did not hesitate. She grabbed what she had from home and came over. Once she scoped things out, she called Paul. She had him bring orange juice and 7-Up for the kids and more cleaning products.

Meanwhile, she got paper towels, rags, and cleaning supplies together. To handle the smell, she actually clipped a clothespin on her nose. With the help of Lorene and Paul, the house got cleaned up and we got the kids resting comfortably. By the time Keith was able to leave work, the kids were asleep. So many times, my brother and wife have been there—ready, willing, and without complaint.

They aren’t the only ones. Others, too, have been there when I fell, needed a ride to the doctor or to take the kids someplace. We have been blessed by caring family and friends.

This Thanksgiving I was thankful not just for a day in which to give thanks, but also a day to be grateful God put such special people in our lives. Real relationships aren’t about selfishness or all-about-me, but about reaching out in God’s love to those around us. For that I give thanks.

Friendships a Matter of Gratitude

I am thankful for family and friends
The kind who rally round
In times of trouble or need
Who don’t expect a return for their effort and time,
Who give with a hug and a smile,
And give again without complaint
Who cry when you cry,
And laugh when you laugh
And make you want to give back in turn
In their time and need
Reaching out as family and friends we
Make the world a better place to be
Because, like Jesus taught and lived, we
Are sacrificial friends.

Especially during times like this year when it is easier to complain, we need to have an attitude of gratitude, not just at Thanksgiving time and on into the Christmas season, but also on every day of the year.

I plan my life out a day at a time, so my posting schedule can be erratic.

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