Where did the time go?

I sit working in a house that still seems new to me. I remember applying for a government loan and waiting and waiting. I remember having to call our representative to get things moving. My brother Paul, a local contractor, accepted what he was allowed from the government and built our house after we discussed and agreed to a plan.

He put more in than he got out of it. He also built the house specifically to my limitations. As a Christmas gift, he put a heating pads under the walk leading from our front door. My house has become my safe place where I can get around even after my many surgeries. I still think of my house as new, yet we moved in a few months before the birth of our first child—December 1979. When I think about it, I realize our house isn’t so new after all.

 The carpet has been changed several times. Once because of water leaking from a busted pipe. We’ve had the roof repaired twice due to hail and storm damage. We replaced the siding due to someone driving right into our house and more. Over the years the roads around our property have been improved. Colins Park across the street has been renovated completely and now includes a splash pad and equipment that draws in our younger grandchildren.

We raised two children in this house and welcomed grandchildren for overnight and longer stays. Three of those grandchildren are now adults.

I’ve spent hours, days, months writing both in my office—the room I took over when our son left home—and by the dining room table where I can look out at the park. I’ve written articles, features, poems and a whole lot of books at my computer.

I have had health issues since contracting Juvenile Rheumatoid Arthritis at thirteen and ended up in a wheelchair for almost 10 years. Only knee joints and later other surgeries got me out and kept me out of the wheelchair. For all my limitations, I have been involved with my family, church and community.

I find myself in a different place now. My health has become more precarious and my body more fragile. If I fall, the damage is more extensive and permanent. My energy levels have decreased along with eyesight and more. I have given up many things I’ve been doing because I simply don’t have the energy—the church prayer bulletin and the Kearney Christian Women’s Connection (KCWC) newsletter to name two.

 Though I cannot do what I once did, I can pray for my family, friends and other needs. I still write, just not as I once did. I also don’t spend as much time marketing my work or in promotion. In fact, I am enjoying giving away copies of my last book. I direct my energy into those things that truly matter—my faith, family and reaching out as time and energy permits.

I wonder where all the time went. Yet I am thankful for each day. Psalm 90:12 NASB says to “So teach us to number our days, That we may present to You a heart of wisdom.” I want to use what time and energy I have wisely which means using it to make a difference through my writing, my media contacts and, especially, in loving my kids and grandkids.

I want to leave behind positive memories of a Savior who loves them so much more than I. I plan to live as abundantly for as long as possible and with gratitude and joy. When Jesus takes me home I want to leave memories of a solid faith, fun and love.

What about you?

© 2023 Carolyn R Scheidies
Kearney Hub Column published 7/18/23

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